Tuesday, February 16, 2010

When I grow up...

I want to be an 'Independent Policy Analyst', because that is the same as being an armchair expert. Not that 'experts' sitting in the large ivory buildings (a former movie hall in South Delhi maybe?) are any better but least they talk to the source. Crap, man, this is almost as bizarre as this particular article I came across. Truly WTF. And I love the term 'bold' role for an actress. Showing skin isn't a sign of 'boldness' (or 'baldness'). Bold is either a Blackberry handset or it is publicly release a document full of mistakes and then blame western media antagonists when it all starts falling apart. And inadvertently, by screwing up, throwing climate change science into a funk. And thus making quite a few megabytes of science programming I've downloaded off the internet quite irrelevant. 'Bold' is not a two-bit actress (high-class escort, take your pick) showing skin, and anyway if you want to see skin watch MTV, not Hindi movies. Particularly not Hindi movies with half-plots. And then there was a TV Channel's sudden discovery of the Aghori's at the Maha-Kumbh yesterday. Pity, no-one watched an excellent (and I mean this, it really was) Zee News feature on the Aghori's a couple of years ago.
PS: Behen Mayawati, Crown Prince Rahulji - I know you both love sycophants particularly you, your Statueship and that you, your highness can operate ATM's. But please tell your supporters not to put signs extolling your virtues (alongside their horribly fugly faces) on highway signboards. Not everyone has a GPS-enabled phone with Google Maps that they can turn to tofigure out just how badly lost inside UP they are. Driving back from Corbett, I realised just how godawful the road between Garhmukteshwar and Hapur actually is, but then I hit Ghaziabad. If there is a war between India and Pakistan, I hope Pakistani missile accuracy means that Ghaziabad is blown off the world's surface - with a Ghazni missile. Strangely appropriate that will be though.

4 comments:

Horn Please!! said...

And you end up paying tolls for that road too, the one that's called NH24 in some of strange wish to express "national", the railway level crossings en route if you go on to Lucknow are chaotic too.

On the IPCC thing, hello, what errors? The glaciers are retreating and/or melting, and "peer science" does not mean somebody who was just born with a peerage - you could please look at the Chinese and European reports and research on the subject, as well as (hello hello) some Indo-Pak co-operation on a glacier not too far from the evening news known as Siachen too. The Gangotri would also be better than Corbett, please go there while you can, while there is something left there.

For the rest, what's wrong with bold flesh?

ms said...

i did see natgeo or discovery feature about the aghori a few years ago, it was extremely informative and factual. but i missed zee offering with all the sensationalism and whispered comments, in the same flavour of their "corror or horredy" (comedy+horror) shows.
and the state of UP has many other attractions that you can wax lyrical about: hooliganism in the name of political movement, corruption in the name of progress. mdme statuewati is the new gabbar singh. next time travel delhi-lucknow or lucknow-kanpur. i don't know if Gazni has the required range of scatter-bombs to hit all 3 places simultaneously.

Anonymous said...

'When I grow up'..don't you just love being a modern-day Peter Pan - well into your fourth decade on this planet and still wanting to grow up! I'd say that was an interesting post with terrible structure..thankfully your blog is nothing close to a publication in need of edits and alert (not stoned) sub/ copy eds.

Anonymous said...

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/13528594/site/newsweek/page/2/print/1/displaymode/1098

You may want to take a look at this, for an alternative take on Ghaziabad.