Whenever we celebrate Independence Day, a wreath is always laid by the Prime Minister at the plinth of the Unknown Soldier at India Gate early in the morning. Remarks by some crazy politicians aside, we, as a nation pay tribute to those whose sacrifices have kept the nation together. Don’t think that I’ve become all patriotic and nationalistic as 15th August approaches. Nope, it is neither that nor have I been drinking too much of Anchorman’s Gatorade (who doubles as a supremely arrogant fear-mongering loudmouth – or whatever the opposite of mild-mannered gawky reporter is – when not saving us from the clutches of Swine Flu/Somali Pirates/Obama/Random Chinese bloggers/Barkha Dutt/Rajdeep Sardesai – his terminal weakness being Pakistani journalists who can shout him down). I genuinely feel that our soldiers get a rather poor lot. Defence deals are invariably cloaked in secrecy and involve Swiss Bank accounts.
Five years ago, thanks to a close friend I ended up travelling to the Allied graveyard at Monte Cassino, the site of one of the most ferocious battles of the Italian campaign. The one thing that awestruck me were the number of Indian names. Soldiers who died fighting a war in a strange country, against a enemy who wasn’t their enemy, and for a cause they didn’t know themselves – Freedom. Tens of thousands of our soldiers fought and died across Europe. But the other day, during one of my Wikipedia diversions (where I just surf from article to article on the site rather randomly, it is great fun, well I think so any which way) I came across an interesting article of the East African campaign. And guess what, thousands of young men, contemporaries of my grandfathers I guess, died in Africa in wars that made next to no sense. On an aside, the BCCI logo looks suspiciously like a Raj hangover - you decide.
What is weird is that the Australians and New Zealanders remember their war dead of the World Wars as ANZAC Day. The Brits wear poppies on their collars around Rememberance Sunday. We get away with the occasional wreath. Even wars fought after independence get forgotten – in all the brouhaha about random Chinese bloggers, we all forget India’s darkest hour (well, not including the time that VP Singh and Chandrashekhar bankrupted us) – 1962. The war that is never mentioned – the History and Civics textbooks of my time spoke at length about 1965 and 1971 and I guess books of the future will talk of 1999, but 1962 – despite Ae Mere Watan Ke Logon - is a war that we like to forget. Well, I guess it is obvious.
Here is my simple point. We celebrate three national holidays and have holidays celebrating most religions to advertise our secular credentials, but why on earth don't we, a country that has lost so many in Wars and a country that still loses far too many every year fighting the fires lit by the politics of inequity, why don't we celebrate our soldiers? I'm sure the average Indian soldier will bristle at the thought of having a dry day declared in their honour (could there be a bigger travesty?). But as people take advantage of the long weekend and I stare blankly into a computer monitor endlessly editing and fine-tuning my story, this is just a thought I had.
Jai Hind!
PS: Its I-Day, I'm allowed a post like this, and anyway I did make fun of Anchorman. Though he actually does it himself. Hey and if you're in the media and don't have a long weekend like your Civvie friends, I salute you too! I just hope you stocked up on booze yesterday. As for me, I'm giving my liver a rest.
Friday, August 14, 2009
Thursday, August 13, 2009
K’s Honest car Reviews Part… Something, anyway they’re back after a long time
One of the few pleasures of living in South Delhi is that every once in a while you can drive like a man possessed – or basically like the folks in West Delhi when they come to the South. The problem is that the once in a while moments usually are too few and far between. After much careful analysis the reason behind the decline of driving is not Sheila Aunty’s hare-brained BRT Corridor, I swear I will kill the next Leftie who says ‘But it works in Bogota!’ Rush jobs in public transport are screwing traffic flows across the city, anyway even though a easy-fix to the BRT problem would be to ban auto-rickshaws and commercial vehicles, but I don’t want to get too far involved in a rant that someone will say is directed against public transport.
I just hate stupidly planned schemes, but then again, doesn’t everyone. But more than the BRT, I should direct my ire at Bajaj Chetak drivers. The child-molesters who drive the worst piece of Indian automotive engineering after the Reva drive with no care for anything else on the road. I don’t dislike Hero Honda drivers, nor do I hate cyclists or the dimwits who weave around in their Pulsar’s. No, the Bajaj Chetak is the single most horrible thing on the roads. The guys will try and force their way virtually everywhere, have no respect for whose paint their rusting footrest scrapes against.
Even though Rajiv Bajaj should be credited for creating a product that proves Darwin’s theory (the Pulsar – I’ve seen far too many accidents on Pulsar’s and pretty much every one is because of idiotic driving, but what would you expect from the average Pulsar driver) I’ve actually personally thanked him personally because he withdrew the Chetak from production. And he allowed Lintas-Lowe to create some pretty kinky new advertising – even though the Benecio Del Toro lookalike in their new advert is bit bizarre.
OK, I was supposed to be reviewing something and it is the Honda Jazz, which for the purpose of this review we will call the ‘Seven Lakh Small Car’ (SLSC) given that journalists are the latest victims of abbreviation-itis. OK, but then again as some comments can’t help but claim I’m a lazy pile of bull-turds, so since I’ve been dubbed a bad journalist I’ll stick to calling it the Jazz.
The reason there are almost four hundred words of filler text is that it is incredibly difficult to justify this car. The reason Honda has priced it at the price they have isn’t because it is incredibly well-engineered and loaded with goodies, which it undeniably is. Honestly, the interiors on this car are the best for any small car on Indian roads save the Fiat 500. The reason Honda has priced it so insanely high is because the financial crisis has hit them hard forcing them to slow down the start of their new plant. So the Jazz is essentially a car that pretty much completely imported from Thailand and put together by a bunch of robots in Greater Noida.
The one thing I fear that they have changed for India is the gearbox, which means that the car ends up with little perceptible power off the line. To get the best out of the engine you’ll need to keep revs well past 3000. There are two stretches of road in the capital, the first the Greater Noida Expressway is a straight line road, and is best enjoyed in something made in Germany or Italy. The second is a lovely twisty road, which unfortunately isn’t quite up to the mark anymore. The Jazz disappointed on both these roads. I’m not saying it was bad, but for the price you could definitely have a lot more fun.
I know this is a terribly stupid thing to do on public roads, especially on public roads where people don’t quite follow rules and random trucks suddenly decide to drive on the wrong side of the road, but occasionally I do throw a car into a turn. Not enough to lose traction, but enough to have a nice time. And the Jazz kept its bearings, but felt quite bored doing it - it isn't as if the car is wobbles through corners, it is assured but there is little feel to it. The car is extremely practical in most respects - interior space is brilliant and fuel economy is surprisingly good - despite my sometimes map-cap shifting and obsession with second and third year to get the car moving, it delivered an impressive 14 k's to a litre.
But it is a SLSC and for that much money it is horribly mediocre. Decent car, but absolutely not worth the price!
I just hate stupidly planned schemes, but then again, doesn’t everyone. But more than the BRT, I should direct my ire at Bajaj Chetak drivers. The child-molesters who drive the worst piece of Indian automotive engineering after the Reva drive with no care for anything else on the road. I don’t dislike Hero Honda drivers, nor do I hate cyclists or the dimwits who weave around in their Pulsar’s. No, the Bajaj Chetak is the single most horrible thing on the roads. The guys will try and force their way virtually everywhere, have no respect for whose paint their rusting footrest scrapes against.
Even though Rajiv Bajaj should be credited for creating a product that proves Darwin’s theory (the Pulsar – I’ve seen far too many accidents on Pulsar’s and pretty much every one is because of idiotic driving, but what would you expect from the average Pulsar driver) I’ve actually personally thanked him personally because he withdrew the Chetak from production. And he allowed Lintas-Lowe to create some pretty kinky new advertising – even though the Benecio Del Toro lookalike in their new advert is bit bizarre.
OK, I was supposed to be reviewing something and it is the Honda Jazz, which for the purpose of this review we will call the ‘Seven Lakh Small Car’ (SLSC) given that journalists are the latest victims of abbreviation-itis. OK, but then again as some comments can’t help but claim I’m a lazy pile of bull-turds, so since I’ve been dubbed a bad journalist I’ll stick to calling it the Jazz.
The reason there are almost four hundred words of filler text is that it is incredibly difficult to justify this car. The reason Honda has priced it at the price they have isn’t because it is incredibly well-engineered and loaded with goodies, which it undeniably is. Honestly, the interiors on this car are the best for any small car on Indian roads save the Fiat 500. The reason Honda has priced it so insanely high is because the financial crisis has hit them hard forcing them to slow down the start of their new plant. So the Jazz is essentially a car that pretty much completely imported from Thailand and put together by a bunch of robots in Greater Noida.
The one thing I fear that they have changed for India is the gearbox, which means that the car ends up with little perceptible power off the line. To get the best out of the engine you’ll need to keep revs well past 3000. There are two stretches of road in the capital, the first the Greater Noida Expressway is a straight line road, and is best enjoyed in something made in Germany or Italy. The second is a lovely twisty road, which unfortunately isn’t quite up to the mark anymore. The Jazz disappointed on both these roads. I’m not saying it was bad, but for the price you could definitely have a lot more fun.
I know this is a terribly stupid thing to do on public roads, especially on public roads where people don’t quite follow rules and random trucks suddenly decide to drive on the wrong side of the road, but occasionally I do throw a car into a turn. Not enough to lose traction, but enough to have a nice time. And the Jazz kept its bearings, but felt quite bored doing it - it isn't as if the car is wobbles through corners, it is assured but there is little feel to it. The car is extremely practical in most respects - interior space is brilliant and fuel economy is surprisingly good - despite my sometimes map-cap shifting and obsession with second and third year to get the car moving, it delivered an impressive 14 k's to a litre.
But it is a SLSC and for that much money it is horribly mediocre. Decent car, but absolutely not worth the price!
Monday, August 10, 2009
Twatter
The ‘Dear Father’ informed moi that someone is upset that I called him a ‘Twatter’, even though I was but merely repeating conversation overheard at The Chambers over lunch. That said, the Twatting preson’s tweet rate has dramatically shot down since aforementioned ‘Twatter’ incident, even though I cannot claim to be a Cambers regular like some other (former) journalists, though the Taj does excel in the food served on the top floor. The ‘House of Singh’ on the other hand needs a desperate makeover.
Enough about Twats and food. I haven’t been blogging lately and this has made me realize the sort of readership I have. Just like the lurkers who follow my tweets, but don’t quite follow me, there are several lurkers who read this blog but are too scared to comment. The reason why I haven’t been blogging is because I don’t seem to have enough vitriol in my system anymore, either that, or I’m so busy working that I genuinely don’t have the time. I think it is the former though. Which in itself means that I definitely don’t miss someone who left this organization recently. Not the one who took over a newspaper, who, it must be said is still most entertaining, and generous with his wine.
What has been intriguing over the past week is how the media seems to have grown a spine when it comes to cricket and cricketers. Either that, or there is a realization that our cricketers are scared that regular drug tests will expose them as frauds and the media is licking its lips at such a prospect. Then again, the amount of time some of these ‘cricketers’ spend in Bombay with the swish set, I’ld be surprised if they didn’t stuff their noses with Columbian/Peruvian powder, the prices of which I believe are shooting up again thanks to increased demand in the capital.
Back to the media, and before you ask me what exciting things are happening, I must admit I’ve been far too busy watching Rakhi Sawant become a born-again Christian to care about Channel 309 on Airtel DTH, which is rather unwatchable at primetime, but vacillates wildly on weekends. Frankly, there were three reasons I bought myself a big-ass LCD panel, the first was to watch live sports – IPL, EPL and even the occasional round of Golf. The second was to play the Xbox360, which I have to admit I’ve slackened a bit on. And the third was to watch random movies and TV serials (such as Top Gear) that are thankfully available through the mysteries of the antarjaal. Watching news is only fun on days when they pronounce buggery legal, just to watch comedy ensue.
The other reason I don’t watch too much TV News is not because I depend on Jon Stewart to see what is happening in the ‘Land of the Free’ but because there is too much of it. Drive past the BJP or CPI(M) headquarters like I do quite often and the outdoor broadcast vans are creating a bloody traffic jam. I don’t want too much analysis and there is the antarjaal you see, which thankfully is also available on my phone. I even have an application delivering me news to my homescreen (though I must remember to shut off data access when I travel broad next time).
I will watch TV if something earth-shattering happens and I will watch a certain channel if they have something truly exclusive. But I would rather watch Manchester United and Chelsea beat up each other live on TV than see pointless, misinformed reports on the epic Ambani tale. Yes, that and someone should tell Saif Ali Khan that while he is a great actor, after he had his heart attack he should stop pretending to be 25-30 because he does look 40!
Enough about Twats and food. I haven’t been blogging lately and this has made me realize the sort of readership I have. Just like the lurkers who follow my tweets, but don’t quite follow me, there are several lurkers who read this blog but are too scared to comment. The reason why I haven’t been blogging is because I don’t seem to have enough vitriol in my system anymore, either that, or I’m so busy working that I genuinely don’t have the time. I think it is the former though. Which in itself means that I definitely don’t miss someone who left this organization recently. Not the one who took over a newspaper, who, it must be said is still most entertaining, and generous with his wine.
What has been intriguing over the past week is how the media seems to have grown a spine when it comes to cricket and cricketers. Either that, or there is a realization that our cricketers are scared that regular drug tests will expose them as frauds and the media is licking its lips at such a prospect. Then again, the amount of time some of these ‘cricketers’ spend in Bombay with the swish set, I’ld be surprised if they didn’t stuff their noses with Columbian/Peruvian powder, the prices of which I believe are shooting up again thanks to increased demand in the capital.
Back to the media, and before you ask me what exciting things are happening, I must admit I’ve been far too busy watching Rakhi Sawant become a born-again Christian to care about Channel 309 on Airtel DTH, which is rather unwatchable at primetime, but vacillates wildly on weekends. Frankly, there were three reasons I bought myself a big-ass LCD panel, the first was to watch live sports – IPL, EPL and even the occasional round of Golf. The second was to play the Xbox360, which I have to admit I’ve slackened a bit on. And the third was to watch random movies and TV serials (such as Top Gear) that are thankfully available through the mysteries of the antarjaal. Watching news is only fun on days when they pronounce buggery legal, just to watch comedy ensue.
The other reason I don’t watch too much TV News is not because I depend on Jon Stewart to see what is happening in the ‘Land of the Free’ but because there is too much of it. Drive past the BJP or CPI(M) headquarters like I do quite often and the outdoor broadcast vans are creating a bloody traffic jam. I don’t want too much analysis and there is the antarjaal you see, which thankfully is also available on my phone. I even have an application delivering me news to my homescreen (though I must remember to shut off data access when I travel broad next time).
I will watch TV if something earth-shattering happens and I will watch a certain channel if they have something truly exclusive. But I would rather watch Manchester United and Chelsea beat up each other live on TV than see pointless, misinformed reports on the epic Ambani tale. Yes, that and someone should tell Saif Ali Khan that while he is a great actor, after he had his heart attack he should stop pretending to be 25-30 because he does look 40!
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Conversations
Yesterday, I spent some time with the publisher of a small-circulation newspaper and we were discussing the internet, distribution and content. Earlier, that day I had spent some time with a consultant talking of future media trends and we spent a long time talking of the Kindle ‘distribution’ model, and the aftermath of that in the light of Amazon’s draconian DRM policies (ironically with Orwell).
Anyway, even though there were some heated discussions with some other people in the room – particularly about journalism and bylines getting devalued, I argued that journalism and bylines got devalued the instant newspapers started to play the ‘price game’ and consumers fell for it. Now, they fall for free shoes and what not, even though newspapers are drastically cutting back on circulation. There is a feeling that the English language press, no make that, the English language media has seen its short golden age ~ 2006-2008.
So what is the new business model that we spoke about, that I also feel might just work? Low-circulation, but free. Sounds crazy, but guess what most lifestyle magazines do, exactly that. Fewer and fewer copies make it onto general stands other than the giant stands – in Delhi these would be in Khan Market, Connaught Place and Def Col. News-stand sales drop down even further as companies don’t want raddi. It also works from an advertising perspective – tell people that these are our 25,000 readers nationwide. New readers are occasionally added by a process of selection. Surrender the bulk of the market to ToI and differentiate. If magazines can pull it off, FHM India has an incredibly small print-run and I believe that Media Trans-Asia is trying to emulate that with Maxim and their other publications as well.
No matter how hard ToI tries, and they are trying, they will always be a mass-market middle-class product and the middle-classes can never be high-brow. Sorry, if this sounds snobbish, and believe me when I say that I read ToI first every morning but that is essentially trying to figure out what on earth is going on in the country and the city. The problem is that being mass has mass costs and increasingly, as mass papers are discovering in the West, those costs will become unsustainable. Especially since, the ‘cover price’ never did cover costs in India, and the ET Now ads are free right?
TV is free already, the problem with TV is slightly different, the only channel that has any sense of gravitas is Undie 24x7, even with the tear-jerking. I’m sorry that RajdeepTV doesn’t but with the wife on air, it never will. But UndieTV is in such financial turmoil, the accounts make for painful reading even for journalists and executives in other media companies. But, I still feel that ubiquitous camera-equipped personal devices coupled with 3G and Wireless Broadband is going to lead to utter chaos in television. Even though, I more skeptical of ‘citizen journalism’ than most.
Yet, while I feel all of this, and believe me this will all play out in my lifetime as a journalist, I still feel that the byline will have some value. I have no clue how much value, but it will still retain something. As The Admiral told me, not everyone can fly every major fighter jet, only air force officers and journalists can.
EDIT: Four years since I stalled the Statcounter code, I've crossed 500,000 page views, not bad. Should monetize but too lazy...
Anyway, even though there were some heated discussions with some other people in the room – particularly about journalism and bylines getting devalued, I argued that journalism and bylines got devalued the instant newspapers started to play the ‘price game’ and consumers fell for it. Now, they fall for free shoes and what not, even though newspapers are drastically cutting back on circulation. There is a feeling that the English language press, no make that, the English language media has seen its short golden age ~ 2006-2008.
So what is the new business model that we spoke about, that I also feel might just work? Low-circulation, but free. Sounds crazy, but guess what most lifestyle magazines do, exactly that. Fewer and fewer copies make it onto general stands other than the giant stands – in Delhi these would be in Khan Market, Connaught Place and Def Col. News-stand sales drop down even further as companies don’t want raddi. It also works from an advertising perspective – tell people that these are our 25,000 readers nationwide. New readers are occasionally added by a process of selection. Surrender the bulk of the market to ToI and differentiate. If magazines can pull it off, FHM India has an incredibly small print-run and I believe that Media Trans-Asia is trying to emulate that with Maxim and their other publications as well.
No matter how hard ToI tries, and they are trying, they will always be a mass-market middle-class product and the middle-classes can never be high-brow. Sorry, if this sounds snobbish, and believe me when I say that I read ToI first every morning but that is essentially trying to figure out what on earth is going on in the country and the city. The problem is that being mass has mass costs and increasingly, as mass papers are discovering in the West, those costs will become unsustainable. Especially since, the ‘cover price’ never did cover costs in India, and the ET Now ads are free right?
TV is free already, the problem with TV is slightly different, the only channel that has any sense of gravitas is Undie 24x7, even with the tear-jerking. I’m sorry that RajdeepTV doesn’t but with the wife on air, it never will. But UndieTV is in such financial turmoil, the accounts make for painful reading even for journalists and executives in other media companies. But, I still feel that ubiquitous camera-equipped personal devices coupled with 3G and Wireless Broadband is going to lead to utter chaos in television. Even though, I more skeptical of ‘citizen journalism’ than most.
Yet, while I feel all of this, and believe me this will all play out in my lifetime as a journalist, I still feel that the byline will have some value. I have no clue how much value, but it will still retain something. As The Admiral told me, not everyone can fly every major fighter jet, only air force officers and journalists can.
EDIT: Four years since I stalled the Statcounter code, I've crossed 500,000 page views, not bad. Should monetize but too lazy...
Monday, July 20, 2009
Weird things...
This is not a random piece of bitchy nothingness, but a piece of random life story...
The last few months have involved a fair amount of work, with a smattering of travel thrown in coupled with good food and lots of beer. But honestly, there has been a lot of work. I don't recall working so hard in the recent past. It made me realise that blog productivity was more of less inversely proportional to 'actual work', even though that really isn't fair. Sometimes I am too lazy to do either. And here is the even weirder thing, I might crib about the work in an occasional post, but I am really enjoying it because I'm doing things I like doing. Sure, the fact that I have my iPod on virtually all the time helps - this is why I love the new Shuffle with its insane battery life - but the work has been interesting.
But back to the point, my Editor told me today morning that on Friday I will have to do something that I have always wanted to. No, not bang a supermodel on an atoll in the Pacific. But something I have really wanted to do, well to be more specific one of those things that I believe made me want to become a journalist, at least in my particular silo any which way. And you what? Right now, I am felling mighty happy that I didn't quit, even though I have both my fingers and my toes crossed. I really, really, really want this to happen.
That said, the most entertaining though to do nowadays is to interview Ministers, the sheer entertainment value of print interviews sometimes is mind-boggling. Yeh mat likho, magar... Chapne ke liye nahin, but... and all this happily carrying on while my recorder isn't paused. I don't know what it is, but a phone recorder - I record on a Nokia N97 right now (more on the phone some other time) - disarms people. Plus I don't have to deal insane proprietary software formats nor do I need to install software just to retrieve the file. Well, a phone recorder and the lack of a television camera. You know, what is funny, I have two really high profile interviews and both organisations are not giving television slots. This much is certain, if they gave ET Now a slot they would be promoting themselves silly in ToI and ET and maybe even carry a double-spread with both these guys.
The downside is that I have to transcribe, I don't outsource because I'm slightly paranoid, but then again, it shouldn't matter.
The last few months have involved a fair amount of work, with a smattering of travel thrown in coupled with good food and lots of beer. But honestly, there has been a lot of work. I don't recall working so hard in the recent past. It made me realise that blog productivity was more of less inversely proportional to 'actual work', even though that really isn't fair. Sometimes I am too lazy to do either. And here is the even weirder thing, I might crib about the work in an occasional post, but I am really enjoying it because I'm doing things I like doing. Sure, the fact that I have my iPod on virtually all the time helps - this is why I love the new Shuffle with its insane battery life - but the work has been interesting.
But back to the point, my Editor told me today morning that on Friday I will have to do something that I have always wanted to. No, not bang a supermodel on an atoll in the Pacific. But something I have really wanted to do, well to be more specific one of those things that I believe made me want to become a journalist, at least in my particular silo any which way. And you what? Right now, I am felling mighty happy that I didn't quit, even though I have both my fingers and my toes crossed. I really, really, really want this to happen.
That said, the most entertaining though to do nowadays is to interview Ministers, the sheer entertainment value of print interviews sometimes is mind-boggling. Yeh mat likho, magar... Chapne ke liye nahin, but... and all this happily carrying on while my recorder isn't paused. I don't know what it is, but a phone recorder - I record on a Nokia N97 right now (more on the phone some other time) - disarms people. Plus I don't have to deal insane proprietary software formats nor do I need to install software just to retrieve the file. Well, a phone recorder and the lack of a television camera. You know, what is funny, I have two really high profile interviews and both organisations are not giving television slots. This much is certain, if they gave ET Now a slot they would be promoting themselves silly in ToI and ET and maybe even carry a double-spread with both these guys.
The downside is that I have to transcribe, I don't outsource because I'm slightly paranoid, but then again, it shouldn't matter.
Friday, July 17, 2009
Internet Shinternet
Don’t get too excited about the internet in India. Looking at current numbers, and I think the 60 million ‘regular’ users figure is bunkum, there are only six million broadband connections in this country, of which I guess only a million or so are with connected ‘digital natives’ such as myself who shamelessly hog bandwidth. Yes, and I also consume a lot of my media needs online, but I still take a newspaper with me to the bog. I still manage (somehow) to read ET’s shameless flogging of their TV channel every morning.
And I still manage to read a few magazines every week. The only tragedy in my multimedia life is that I have really cut back on my book consumption, though I recently finished off Mario Vargas Llosa’s The Bad Girl and will reaffirm that Llosa is the best contemporary Latin American writer (if you haven’t read The War at the End of the World or The Feast of the Goat you are missing out on something). That is the tragedy of following cricket games with ball-by-ball online commentary, reading over 200 feeds everyday ranging from the innocuous to the humourous to the downright salacious. Hey, one has to follow the underbelly of the internet – and my god, Indians love posting videos of themselves having sex online, really bizarre some of the stuff you come across.
Anyway, the point I’m trying to make is simple. In the west, the internet is killing the media. Well, not the internet per se, but the fact that the net has made it possible to read news not on dead trees but of a multitude of devices. News that can now technically geo-locate you (on your mobile) and deliver news customized to your exact location. Next time you’re stuck in a lift, you will get a news alert of being stuck on a lift thanks to your phone (the fact that GPS signals aren’t available on an elevator is a ‘minor’ technical issue which I will, like most journalists disregard). When it comes to TV, what better way than have a ‘Create Your Own Anchor’ sort of app, that will save us from phenomena such as Super-Anchor-Man on Times Now and Weepy Wonder Woman on UndieTV.
Technically all this is possible, but the connectivity numbers just do not add up. I am a big fan of social media and use it aggressively, but hearing some numbers make me wonder, Rs 75 crore industry, for christs sake. And some so-called evangelists talking stuff on how citizen journalism is the future. I am not a cynical journalist bemoaning the rise of the internet, far from it. This blog has been around for six years almost and in the four years since I installed Statcounter, it has over 500,000 views. Big deal! The thing is that a lot of online ‘citizen news’ sites in India tread dangerously on copyright laws, and are little more than rehashes of what is said in the Times of India. As for Twitter and 26/11, I was using it (Yes, I tweet too but not as K), and most of it were either ultra-nationalistic opinions by foreign desis or paraphrases of what was being said by Barkha or Arnab, along with a lot of bitching about Barkha.
The internet is still a medium of the elite in India, many people might have occasional access to it but unless and until the auctions for new spectrum happen, nothing is going to change. Even if that comes through, the government’s greed, rather its potential to spend will mean that the prices demanded at the auction will be so high so as to keep internet access a privilege of the rich. This might have some of us worried, but not all of us and might actually pose bigger problems for television rather than print. Some people are talking about e-readers being used in India – a $249 product to read news. You kidding me? An annual subscription to paper will not cross Rs 1000 in India. A bunch of premium news channels will set you back barely Rs 20 a month.
You get the news you pay for, and frankly we pay next to nothing for news in India. Raise prices and the busybodies who complain about quality get righteous. The last time the news magazines raised cover prices Rs 5, a mail went around accusing them of taking advantage of the reader (though I suspect this came from Ponytail’s magazine). And circulation dropped. If a news channel went from ‘free’ to ‘pay’ viewership drops. People have spoken about micropayments, and how they work in India, but you expect me to believe that someone will pay Rs 2 for a story even though he or she doesn’t care about spending that kind of money on every Vodafone spam message contest which the company kindly texts you five times a day. Nope.
That said, the newspaper ain’t dying anytime soon in India. Nor is the news channel, even though their profligate ways might mean that some die. The magazine on the other hand…
PS: If you folks have been wondering why the radio silence, I am not under gag orders (from either my dad, my step-dad, my boss, my big boss or my ex-boss), it has just been that my new boss has just piled me under with work. I guess idle thumbs make for an active blogger, and I can write this post only because I’ve got down time between my story and reading the proof while waiting to leave and go watch HP6, even though the NYT review wasn’t encouraging. I will also go watch the news Transformers movie, but that is because of Megan Fox and the FX.
PPS: A little birdie informs me that one big-time (ex maybe) journo on Twitter, an avowed Luddite dicates his Tweets to someone who Tweets them. Somehow that is just so cool…
And I still manage to read a few magazines every week. The only tragedy in my multimedia life is that I have really cut back on my book consumption, though I recently finished off Mario Vargas Llosa’s The Bad Girl and will reaffirm that Llosa is the best contemporary Latin American writer (if you haven’t read The War at the End of the World or The Feast of the Goat you are missing out on something). That is the tragedy of following cricket games with ball-by-ball online commentary, reading over 200 feeds everyday ranging from the innocuous to the humourous to the downright salacious. Hey, one has to follow the underbelly of the internet – and my god, Indians love posting videos of themselves having sex online, really bizarre some of the stuff you come across.
Anyway, the point I’m trying to make is simple. In the west, the internet is killing the media. Well, not the internet per se, but the fact that the net has made it possible to read news not on dead trees but of a multitude of devices. News that can now technically geo-locate you (on your mobile) and deliver news customized to your exact location. Next time you’re stuck in a lift, you will get a news alert of being stuck on a lift thanks to your phone (the fact that GPS signals aren’t available on an elevator is a ‘minor’ technical issue which I will, like most journalists disregard). When it comes to TV, what better way than have a ‘Create Your Own Anchor’ sort of app, that will save us from phenomena such as Super-Anchor-Man on Times Now and Weepy Wonder Woman on UndieTV.
Technically all this is possible, but the connectivity numbers just do not add up. I am a big fan of social media and use it aggressively, but hearing some numbers make me wonder, Rs 75 crore industry, for christs sake. And some so-called evangelists talking stuff on how citizen journalism is the future. I am not a cynical journalist bemoaning the rise of the internet, far from it. This blog has been around for six years almost and in the four years since I installed Statcounter, it has over 500,000 views. Big deal! The thing is that a lot of online ‘citizen news’ sites in India tread dangerously on copyright laws, and are little more than rehashes of what is said in the Times of India. As for Twitter and 26/11, I was using it (Yes, I tweet too but not as K), and most of it were either ultra-nationalistic opinions by foreign desis or paraphrases of what was being said by Barkha or Arnab, along with a lot of bitching about Barkha.
The internet is still a medium of the elite in India, many people might have occasional access to it but unless and until the auctions for new spectrum happen, nothing is going to change. Even if that comes through, the government’s greed, rather its potential to spend will mean that the prices demanded at the auction will be so high so as to keep internet access a privilege of the rich. This might have some of us worried, but not all of us and might actually pose bigger problems for television rather than print. Some people are talking about e-readers being used in India – a $249 product to read news. You kidding me? An annual subscription to paper will not cross Rs 1000 in India. A bunch of premium news channels will set you back barely Rs 20 a month.
You get the news you pay for, and frankly we pay next to nothing for news in India. Raise prices and the busybodies who complain about quality get righteous. The last time the news magazines raised cover prices Rs 5, a mail went around accusing them of taking advantage of the reader (though I suspect this came from Ponytail’s magazine). And circulation dropped. If a news channel went from ‘free’ to ‘pay’ viewership drops. People have spoken about micropayments, and how they work in India, but you expect me to believe that someone will pay Rs 2 for a story even though he or she doesn’t care about spending that kind of money on every Vodafone spam message contest which the company kindly texts you five times a day. Nope.
That said, the newspaper ain’t dying anytime soon in India. Nor is the news channel, even though their profligate ways might mean that some die. The magazine on the other hand…
PS: If you folks have been wondering why the radio silence, I am not under gag orders (from either my dad, my step-dad, my boss, my big boss or my ex-boss), it has just been that my new boss has just piled me under with work. I guess idle thumbs make for an active blogger, and I can write this post only because I’ve got down time between my story and reading the proof while waiting to leave and go watch HP6, even though the NYT review wasn’t encouraging. I will also go watch the news Transformers movie, but that is because of Megan Fox and the FX.
PPS: A little birdie informs me that one big-time (ex maybe) journo on Twitter, an avowed Luddite dicates his Tweets to someone who Tweets them. Somehow that is just so cool…
Monday, July 13, 2009
Redesign
I liked the latest iteration of HT, this is the 'fourth' look of HT in the past decade but this new Guardian-esque redesign does seem to have a lot going for it. Still next to no business coverage and alarmingly little coverage on several other areas, but HT is the best looking paper in town. At least for the time being. The problem with any design, as layout artists will tell you is maintaining the design. And the problem there is that reporters, who have little clue of the english language to start with have next to no understanding of design. To work to a design (rather than a word-count) is a fact of life for many of us, it makes life rather unbearable when you have to juggle bits and pieces of your story around but a 'pretty' looking story might just get read in a mainstream publication rather than a dull one. So nice redesign, but why on earth do you still have the silly front-page 'shoulder' advert, and now to work on content.
A few friends often lament the death of long form (there is The Hindu, but extreme communism is no-one's cup of tea) in mainstream publications in India. Well, there never was a New Yorker or its ilk in India (Harper's Magazine, The Atlantic et al.) and that is tragic, but that just says more about the population at large (we are already an Idiotcracy if not very far from being one) than anything else. That said, ToI is still on-course to launch a 'thinking' paper soon. Given that the last launch from Bennett was ET Now which I feel is in danger of believing its own hype about its greatness - why did they go overboard on Nusli Wadia for crying out loud, and I will reserve my comments on the quality of the interview. Anyway, I'm not sure if I want long-form from the ToI, and even less sure if it will work, but maybe it will. Don't get enthusiastic and think that India needs a long-form magazine now, readers here are too cheap to pay, only grade-A morons like me end up spending a bomb on magazines and papers.
Now back to work and figuring out how to figure something out.
A few friends often lament the death of long form (there is The Hindu, but extreme communism is no-one's cup of tea) in mainstream publications in India. Well, there never was a New Yorker or its ilk in India (Harper's Magazine, The Atlantic et al.) and that is tragic, but that just says more about the population at large (we are already an Idiotcracy if not very far from being one) than anything else. That said, ToI is still on-course to launch a 'thinking' paper soon. Given that the last launch from Bennett was ET Now which I feel is in danger of believing its own hype about its greatness - why did they go overboard on Nusli Wadia for crying out loud, and I will reserve my comments on the quality of the interview. Anyway, I'm not sure if I want long-form from the ToI, and even less sure if it will work, but maybe it will. Don't get enthusiastic and think that India needs a long-form magazine now, readers here are too cheap to pay, only grade-A morons like me end up spending a bomb on magazines and papers.
Now back to work and figuring out how to figure something out.
Monday, July 06, 2009
Boojet 2009
No, I will not bore you with incredulous stories of how the government will be taxing your potty now. I started getting ET Now on Airtel DTH yesterday so today morning because I kinda got heldf up, I thought, might as well watch the budget at home than in office or some large conference hall. After all, I do have a halfway-decent LCD panel (grumble, grumble - duties have come down, though it really wouldn't have hit the price that much). Anyway, this much is for certain, CNBC-TV18 landed one helluva' blow with their first wave of guests - Uday Kotak, Deepak Parekh and KV Kamath. And ET Now had Arnab Goswami talking (versus Mitali, is that even fair competition - why Arnab? Why not Andy, Abheek or Sri? They sound a lot less shrill). Guess who won the battle for the remote in the first wave. ET Now's guests were so-so and the other channels were lost in the water. Don't get me wrong, I do like what I have seen on ET Now until now, but today was the battle of the channels. And while the evening shows might be different, and you do watch the business channels in the evening on a day like today, I will be 35,000 feet in the air during prime-time. Not that I think that I'll be missing much, though a good bitch-fest is always fun!
Friday, July 03, 2009
Scheiße
Yes, I know that Section 377 of the Indian Penal Code has been sort of declared unconstitutional, I mean sort of because Delhi's higher court is yet to review it. I also know that this means that everyone can finally get blow-jobs legally (how come no-one wrote about that?) after not all sex involves penetration of a hole at the bottom of your torso. The point being that why on earth did everyone go so frikkin' beserk over it in the media (one internal mail in a TV channel had the lovely term 'gayism' in the context - "we should cover all aspects of 'gayism'" - never knew that it was a '-ism' until now). Seeing the wall-to-wall coverage made it seem like that Gay guys would go around buggering each having in public (the cops will still frown on public displays of affection - and I wonder how on earth they will amend Section 375) , and the insanity of the coverage made homophobes even more stringent in their opposition. Primarily because much of the coverage was silly and anchored by illiterate idiots most of the time - Times Now comes to mind first and foremost. And if you wanted to see homophobia in full flight (other than Baba Ramdev promising to cure homosexuality through Yoga!), the language news channels were there with their versions of craziness. It was a pity that Dinara safina did not give Venus Williams as strong a challenge as Elena Dementieva gave Serena Williams, at least I could have watched Winbledon for a while longer. Watching news TV was hellish yesterday. And what is worse we are now heading into the budget madness on TV.
PS: I still don't get ET Now - anyone listening? Talking of which PR people have interesting stories, but more on that later.
PS: I still don't get ET Now - anyone listening? Talking of which PR people have interesting stories, but more on that later.
Thursday, July 02, 2009
The end of journalism, Mr Narisetti?
While the news sites and TV channels are all overjoyed with the Section 377 ruling - I refer you back to a blog post I wrote a long, long time ago. Anyway, while I applaud the Delhi High Court, which at times seems to me to be the only sensible HC in India, I am yet to read the details of the case. talking about stuff I wrote a long time, there is this post about us Indians being more racist than most.
Anyway, this post is about something I read about Raju's new employers that left me feeling a bit shaken. (EDIT: WaPo has their ill-thought out plan off, hope no-one at Times Group got wind of it) One can argue that such things have been happening in ndia for a while, but never 'officially'. Sure, sometimes the editor-proprietor, and we know that the line has been very blurred for a while, has used his 'access' to parley favours for friends. But this is akin to MediaNet and whatever the other news organisations call their equivalent organisations charging for access to ministers and the like. Imagine, The Hindu charging for access to MMS, since their old Delhi CoB is now the Media Advisor to the PM. This is like that.
In other news on the media front, while a bunch of people have been removed at News X, some decent people among them whose fault was to align with the old powers that be (even though that was an incredibly stupid thing to do, if you ask me personally), there are people being hired as well. We hear that PGT, long relegated to Lok Sabha TV will be making a Prime-Time talk show return when the channel is rebranded. I really must stop watching news TV completely now, why can't tennis be a year-round sport. And talking about Tennis, here is an open letter...
"Dear Star Sports,
I do not wish or want to watch Sania, Bhupati or Leander Paes play pointless Doubles games when there is a Federer, Nadal, Djokovic or Murray game on. I will be willing to pay you for that. Yes, I realise that I am paying Airtel a lot for bandwidth and can actually watch the games online thanks to some kind soul somewhere in the world streaming the match. But I would much prefer a decent TV stream anyday. I bought a bad-ass 40-inch panel to watch increasing amounts of live sports. I would li9ke to meet the head of your Tennis programming and whack him over the head with a racket. Preferably a very tightly-strung one. This is why I wish that our players lose Doubles rather fast. At least this year, they didn't disappoint me.
Yours Truly,
K"
PS: Weird no, all the Eastern European chiklets got all the Press, but the two Williams' are playing the Womens finals!
Anyway, this post is about something I read about Raju's new employers that left me feeling a bit shaken. (EDIT: WaPo has their ill-thought out plan off, hope no-one at Times Group got wind of it) One can argue that such things have been happening in ndia for a while, but never 'officially'. Sure, sometimes the editor-proprietor, and we know that the line has been very blurred for a while, has used his 'access' to parley favours for friends. But this is akin to MediaNet and whatever the other news organisations call their equivalent organisations charging for access to ministers and the like. Imagine, The Hindu charging for access to MMS, since their old Delhi CoB is now the Media Advisor to the PM. This is like that.
In other news on the media front, while a bunch of people have been removed at News X, some decent people among them whose fault was to align with the old powers that be (even though that was an incredibly stupid thing to do, if you ask me personally), there are people being hired as well. We hear that PGT, long relegated to Lok Sabha TV will be making a Prime-Time talk show return when the channel is rebranded. I really must stop watching news TV completely now, why can't tennis be a year-round sport. And talking about Tennis, here is an open letter...
"Dear Star Sports,
I do not wish or want to watch Sania, Bhupati or Leander Paes play pointless Doubles games when there is a Federer, Nadal, Djokovic or Murray game on. I will be willing to pay you for that. Yes, I realise that I am paying Airtel a lot for bandwidth and can actually watch the games online thanks to some kind soul somewhere in the world streaming the match. But I would much prefer a decent TV stream anyday. I bought a bad-ass 40-inch panel to watch increasing amounts of live sports. I would li9ke to meet the head of your Tennis programming and whack him over the head with a racket. Preferably a very tightly-strung one. This is why I wish that our players lose Doubles rather fast. At least this year, they didn't disappoint me.
Yours Truly,
K"
PS: Weird no, all the Eastern European chiklets got all the Press, but the two Williams' are playing the Womens finals!
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